Now I know what you're maybe thinking. You're maybe thinking that "awesome" is not a "number." If this sounds like something that you might agree with, come on over and pull up a chair, buddy. Actually, on second thought, just go ahead and sit right there on the floor. You see, chairs are awesome, and since awesome definitely equals chair, and you hate awesome, you get to sit on the floor. See how this works? I'm in charge here, stupid.
How, in this great glorious continent of almighty awesome, could someone possibly defy the power of the number awesome? Let me answer this question by asking YOU a question.. You're retarded. Now I'm pretty sure that "You're retarded" isn't very PC (which stands for Please Kill Yourself), nor is it a question. That was a test, and you failed again. Why? Because first of all you're on the floor, which isn't awesome. naturally it follows that if you're not in an awesome sitting position, you're retarded (I bet you regret your stupid rejection of the awesome = 1 eqation now, stupid).
Now on to the today's recipe, boys and really hot girls that wanna bone me.
RILEYV'S ROCKETSKOOP OF SPECIAL AWESOME
Take one scoop of awesome
Add some salt (preferably awesome brand awesome salt)
Flip the oven to rock and roll flavor
Kick that asshole on the floor over there
Pick up the "rocketsauce" brand rocket oven with large lifting thing (preferably a crane, helicopter, or my personal favorite, rocketsauce brand super rocket) and drop it approximately 400,000 feet
Awesome? You better believe it, stupid.
You're welcome.
-RileyV
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